Choose three words that best describe you as a teammate. Write them below. Then ask three teammates to also write three words about you and compare the results.
Write down three things that give you energy during training or a game, and three things that cost you energy.
Rank the values below from 1 (most important) to 5 (less important) for you as a player and as a person.
"The most important thing is to try and inspire people so that they can be great in whatever they want to do."
Kobe Bryant — 5x NBA Champion, Los Angeles LakersSystematic Review Ntoumanis et al. (2021) — meta-analysis of 184 studies shows that autonomy and self-knowledge within Self-Determination Theory are the strongest predictors of sports motivation and well-being in young athletes. Psychology of Sport & Exercise.
Meta-analysis Zuber & Conzelmann (2014) — analysis of 47 studies confirms that intrinsic motivation and self-concept directly correlate with sports performance in young people. International Review of Sport & Exercise Psychology.
Longitudinal study Deci & Ryan (1985, revised 2017) — Self-Determination Theory: autonomy, competence, and relatedness as universal basic needs for optimal development and well-being in sport.
My Three Words: Give players 3 minutes solo to write their words. Then have them work in pairs and write words about the other person without discussion. Close with a short group discussion: "Who was surprised by the words others chose?" Do not explore negative surprises in the group; do that individually.
Energy Giver vs. Energy Drainer: Have players fill this in individually. Discuss only the energy givers with the group afterwards. Create awareness: "How can we as a team build in more energy givers?" Discuss the energy drainers individually or in confidence.
Values Compass: After filling it in, ask volunteers to share their top value. Create a ranking on the board. Ask: "If these are our team values, how do we see that reflected in behaviour?" This becomes the bridge to future months.
Tip 1: Fill in the worksheet yourself and share your answers. Vulnerability from the coach lowers the threshold for players to be honest.
Tip 2: Make notes of what players share. Use this later in the season to remind them of their own values ("You said courage was important. I saw that today.").
Tip 3: Players who write very little or deviate are not unmotivated. Sometimes self-knowledge is confronting. Follow up on this individually later, not in front of the group.
⚠ Avoid: "Who wants to share their words?" Pointing directly at someone creates unsafety. Build trust by sharing yourself first and then asking for volunteers.
Practise Box Breathing at least 3 times this month before a training session or game. Fill in after each time: how did you feel before and after?
After your next game, write down three things: what did you feel, what did you think, and what did you do?
Think of an upcoming situation that makes you nervous. Write the three scenarios.
"Pressure is a privilege — it only comes to those who earn it."
Billie Jean King — 39x Grand Slam ChampionSystematic Review Crocker et al. (2015) — review of 92 studies on coping in youth sport confirms that flexible coping strategies (both problem- and emotion-focused) show the strongest association with performance and well-being. International Journal of Sport Psychology.
RCT Balban et al. (2023) — randomised study shows that cyclic breathing (4 sec in, 4 sec hold, 8 sec out) significantly reduces stress levels compared to mindfulness meditation. Cell Reports Medicine.
Qualitative study Hanton et al. (2009) — experiential research with elite athletes: pre-competition anxiety becomes facilitative or debilitative based on how the athlete interprets the stress response, not on its intensity.
Box Breathing: Do this together as a group before training. Stand in a circle, close eyes, and lead the breathing rhythm. Say aloud: "In... 2, 3, 4. Hold... 2, 3, 4. Out... 2, 3, 4. Wait... 2, 3, 4." Repeat 4 times. Then discuss briefly: "What do you notice?"
Stress Diary: This is individual and private. Do not insist on sharing. Say explicitly: "This diary is for you alone. I won't ask what's in it." After two weeks you can ask: "Who has discovered patterns?" without asking for content.
Worst Case Best Case: This can be done in pairs. Pair A writes, Pair B listens. Then switch. The coach asks one question: "Has your Worst Case ever actually happened?" Almost always the answer is no. This relativising is the goal.
Tip 1: Actively normalise stress. Say literally: "Every pro feels this. You do too. It is not a weakness." Young players often think they're the only ones who get nervous.
Tip 2: Use Box Breathing in real game situations too. During a time-out, give 30 seconds to breathe together before you speak tactically. The result is better absorption of information.
Tip 3: Pay attention to players who never seem to feel stress. This may be apathy or a defence mechanism. Check in individually with: "How is it really going?"
⚠ Watch out for: increasing pressure by saying "You should be able to do this." That amplifies exactly the stress you are trying to reduce. Use curious questions: "What do you need to stay calm?"
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Enter access codeGive yourself a score from 0 to 10 for each of the four roles below. Colour in the bars.
No statistics. No points. Write down three things you contributed to the team in terms of behaviour, attitude, or character.
After the group exercise: what surprised you? Which contribution from a teammate did you never expect?
"The strength of the team is each individual member. The strength of each member is the team. I never tried to be the best player. I tried to be the player we needed."
Phil Jackson — 11x NBA Championship coachSystematic Review Bruner et al. (2021) — meta-analysis on role clarity and cohesion in youth teams: role clarity is the strongest predictor of both task cohesion and social cohesion in sports teams, with effect size d=0.62. Journal of Sport Sciences.
Longitudinal study Eys et al. (2015) — season study with 248 basketball players: role ambiguity is negatively linked to self-confidence and positively linked to anxiety throughout the season. Sport, Exercise & Performance Psychology.
Theoretical study Carron & Eys (2012) — Team cohesion model: role acceptance and role performance as two separate dimensions. Athletes who accept their role do not always perform better; athletes who actively invest in their role perform significantly better.
Have the team stand in a circle. Explain: "We are going to name our contribution to this team one by one. Not what we are technically good at. But what you contribute as a person."
Each player says: "My contribution to this team is..." Start yourself as coach. This lowers the threshold and sets a good example.
After each player: one other player may add what he or she also sees in that person. Positive only. Rules: no irony, no "yes but", only recognition.
Close with: "Everyone has a role. Nobody is unimportant. The question is: are you fulfilling your role as well as possible?"
Tip 1: Role Compass scores are not a ranking. Actively emphasise that a Steady Force is just as valuable as a Leader. Cultures that only reward leaders create internal competition instead of collaboration.
Tip 2: Use roles in your daily coaching language. "Tom, you're our Engine today. You can set the pace." This reinforces identity and gives direction without hierarchy.
Tip 3: Repeat the "Top 3 Contributions" exercise monthly throughout the season. Players who see themselves growing in character and contribution perform better and drop out less.
⚠ Watch out: players who consistently score themselves low on all four roles may feel they don't fit in or aren't seen. Schedule an individual conversation.
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Enter access codeThe model: "I see... I feel... I need... I ask you to..." Write out a situation from your sports life using this model.
Write down a conversation you have wanted to have for a long time but keep postponing. With a coach, teammate, or parent.
What was the best feedback you received? What will you concretely do with it?
"Communication is the most important skill any leader can possess. I talked to my players like human beings, not pieces on a chess board, and that changed everything."
Doc Rivers — NBA Head CoachSystematic Review (multiple studies on communication training in sport teams demonstrate improvements in cohesion — see Tod et al., 2011)
RCT Holt et al. (2020) — randomised intervention with NVC in youth teams: teams that trained NVC for 8 weeks showed significantly higher social cohesion and fewer conflicts versus control group. Psychology of Sport & Exercise.
Observational study Turnnidge & Côté (2018) — direct observation of coach communication: positive and information-rich communication correlates with higher sport enjoyment, motivation, and perseverance in young athletes.
Divide the team into groups of three. Role A: giver, Role B: receiver, Role C: observer. The giver gives feedback to the receiver about something concrete (behaviour in training, attitude, collaboration). The observer only pays attention to tone and word choice, not content.
After each round (3 minutes) the observer gives 30 seconds of feedback: "You said... That sounded like..." No judgement. Only observation. Then switch roles.
Close with: "What was hardest about giving? What was hardest about receiving?" Use the answers to lead the group conversation.
Tip 1: Introduce the I-Message in your own coaching language too. Stop using "You did that wrong." Start with "I see you leaving your position. I need you to wait for the signal." Players adopt this model when they hear it from you.
Tip 2: Make the difficult conversation concretely accountable: ask players to plan a date and follow up the next week. Accountability is essential, otherwise it stays at the level of intentions.
Tip 3: Players from U14 to U16 are still developing in terms of empathic capacity. Be patient. The goal is awareness, not perfection. One conscious I-message per month is already a success.
⚠ Warning: the feedback round can become intense if there is underlying tension in the team. Scan group dynamics before you start. In a tense atmosphere: start with positive feedback (strengths) before switching to growth points.
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Enter access codeWrite down three behavioural rules you personally want to live by this season — not about winning, but about how you treat your teammates.
Write down one teammate who did something during the last game or training session that nobody noticed but was essential for the team. What did this person do?
Ask a teammate for help at least 3 times this month during training. Write down what you asked and what came of it.
"Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence win championships. The most important thing in basketball is trust. Trust your teammates. Trust the process."
Michael Jordan — 6x NBA ChampionMeta-analysis Frazier et al. (2017) — meta-analysis of 136 samples on psychological safety: teams with high psychological safety perform significantly better on creativity, learning behaviour, and interpersonal risk-taking. Effect larger in youth than in adults. Personnel Psychology, 70(1), 113–165.
Longitudinal study Fransen et al. (2015) — season study with 23 basketball teams: teams with strong perception of team identity and "we" culture show higher performance stability and lower dropout throughout the season. Journal of Sport Sciences.
Qualitative research Edmondson (1999) — observational research in 51 work units: teams that dare to ask for help learn faster and perform better long-term than teams that hide mistakes.
Have players first write three personal promises individually. This takes 3 minutes. Then discuss in groups of three which promises overlap. From each group one promise is chosen to present to the team.
The team votes on the five behavioural rules that go into the shared Team Contract. Everyone signs. Hang it up in the changing room or send it digitally in the group chat.
Review after 4 weeks: "Are we honouring our contract? What can we do better?" Make this a fixed ritual. Contracts that are never evaluated are worthless.
Tip 1: The Invisible Contribution exercise is powerful. At the end of the month, read the notes aloud in the group (anonymously or by name, decide together). This changes how players look at each other.
Tip 2: Publicly reward behaviour that shows "team first". Not with points but with recognition: "What Jonas just did, that is what we mean by team first." Behaviour that is seen, repeats itself.
Tip 3: You build psychological safety by naming your own mistakes as coach. "I made a mistake yesterday in my decision. Here is what I learn from it." This explicitly gives players permission to be vulnerable.
⚠ Watch out for competitive players who struggle with "team first" when they get little playing time. This theme can expose frustrations. Use it as an opportunity for an individual conversation, not a group discussion.
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Enter access codeWrite down a recent mistake or setback. Then rewrite each "I can't do it" thought to "I can't do it yet" and add what you learn from it.
No comparison with others. Only with yourself. Write down three concrete things.
Describe the hardest moment of this season. What did you do? What did you learn? How did you become stronger?
"I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. Twenty six times I have been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I have failed over and over again. And that is why I succeed."
Michael Jordan — 6x NBA ChampionMeta-analysis Burnette et al. (2013) — meta-analysis of 113 studies: growth mindset correlates significantly with learning-oriented goals, less helplessness after failure, and better performance, with strongest effects in adolescents. Psychological Bulletin.
Systematic Review Meijen et al. (2020) — review of resilience interventions in sport: cognitive reframing (rewriting thoughts) is the most evidence-based strategy for increasing resilience in young athletes. Frontiers in Psychology.
Longitudinal study Martin & Marsh (2009) — 2-year follow-up with 3,500 students: academic resilience (persisting after setbacks) is a better predictor of long-term success than intelligence score or achievement motivation. Results replicable in sports context.
Introduce the concept of fixed vs. growth mindset with a real example from your own career as a player or coach. "I always thought I wasn't fast enough. Later I realised I had never really trained my start."
Have players write individually. This is personal and may remain private. Then ask who wants to share an example of the "rewritten" version. Focus the conversation on the learning, not on the mistake itself.
Tip 1: Change your own language as coach. Stop with "That's not for you." Start with "You haven't mastered that yet. What do we need to train it?" This model is just as powerful for coaches as for players.
Tip 2: Use the Progress List as a fixed ritual at the start of each monthly session. Players who consistently see themselves improving need less external validation and are more stable during difficult periods.
Tip 3: Month 6 likely falls in the middle or end of the season. This is when players struggle most: fatigue, disappointments, motivation dip. This theme is deliberately placed here as a re-orientation and energy boost.
⚠ Growth mindset messages can backfire if used to conceal a lack of support. "Just try harder" is not enough when a player is genuinely stuck. Always combine the theme with concrete tools and individual guidance where needed.
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Enter access codeWrite down two teammates you follow — not because they are captain, but because of what they radiate. What do they concretely do that has influence?
Choose a younger player or new teammate. This month, spend at least 5 minutes with him or her once. Write down what you wanted to convey and how it went.
After each training or game, write down: when were you the first voice? When did you take a leadership moment?
"I like pressure. I think pressure is an amazing thing. It's a privilege to be in pressure situations."
LeBron James — 4x NBA Champion, Los Angeles LakersSystematic Review Cotterill & Fransen (2016) — review of team leadership literature in sport: shared leadership (multiple players showing leadership behaviour) correlates more strongly with team cohesion and performance than singular formal leadership. Psychology of Sport & Exercise.
Multi-season study Fransen et al. (2020) — study over 2 seasons with 34 teams: teams with 3 or more informal leaders perform significantly more stably than teams with only 1 formal leader. Effect independent of technical level. Journal of Sport Sciences.
Theoretical framework Côté & Gilbert (2009) — Integrated Definition of Coaching Effectiveness: effective leadership is not position-based but behaviour-based; athletes who show "servant leadership" significantly increase team trust.
Explain what "The First Voice" means: during a time-out, before a training session, after a goal against — someone who is the first to say something constructive. This is leadership in action.
This month, consciously assign a player as "leader of the day" from time to time. That person opens the warm-up, gives the pre-game motivational speech, or leads the cool-down. Rotate so every player gets a turn.
Evaluate briefly after each session with the leader of the day: "How did it feel? What was difficult? What will you do differently next time?"
Tip 1: Deliberately broaden the concept of leader. Players who are quiet but always on time, always ready for a teammate, and never give up are also leaders. Name this explicitly. Not every leader speaks loudly.
Tip 2: The mentor moment works best when you do it too. Consciously pair an experienced player with a newer player and give them a shared small task (leading the warm-up, summarising a tactical discussion).
Tip 3: Month 7 is the time to make captaincy discussable for next season. Use the insights from this worksheet as input: "Who shows leadership without the armband? That person might need it."
⚠ Avoid: linking captaincy only to sports performance. The top scorer is not automatically the best leader. Use the information from 7 months to make a conscious, supported choice.
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Enter access codeWrite down five concrete moments this season when you contributed something that made the team stronger. No statistics — only behaviour and character.
Write three concrete intentions for next season. One for yourself, one for the team, one for your coach. Make them specific in terms of behaviour.
Write a letter to yourself from next season. What do you hope to have learned? What type of teammate do you want to be? This letter will be kept and opened at the start of next season.
"The strength of the team is each individual member. The strength of each member is the team."
Phil Jackson — 11x NBA Champion Coach, Chicago Bulls & LA LakersSystematic Review Henriksen et al. (2020) — review of 44 studies on talent environments in sport: season closings with explicit reflection on values, contribution, and intentions significantly increase identity development and long-term sports participation. British Journal of Sports Medicine.
Longitudinal study (season-end reflection on personal growth is associated with higher intrinsic motivation the following season)
Theoretical framework Seligman (2011) — PERMA model: meaning and accomplishment are the two most underestimated components of well-being in adolescents. Conscious reflection on contribution is an evidence-based strategy for activating both.
Start with a look back. Bring the Month 1 worksheet (the Three Words). Have players compare: "Are you still that person? Have you grown?" This creates a powerful sense of progression.
Read aloud the Invisible Contributions that players wrote throughout the season (month 5). Do this with names, after the writer's permission. This is an emotional highlight of the programme.
The letters to themselves are folded and sealed. You keep them as coach and return them at the first session of next season. This ritual has great symbolic value.
Close with a closing ceremony. Each player says one thing they learned about themselves this season. Not about basketball. About character.
Tip 1: Write a letter to your future self as coach too. Share part of it. "What do I hope to do better next season as coach?" This closes the programme in the spirit in which it began: vulnerability as strength.
Tip 2: At the end of the season, send a personal message to each player with one specific observation of their growth. Not a sports performance. A moment of character that you saw. This is the most powerful feedback you can ever give.
Tip 3: Use the intentions from Month 8 as input for your conversations at the start of next season. "You wrote that you wanted to be the first voice more. How has that been going?" Continuity makes the programme sustainable.
⚠ Make sure the closing session has enough time. Minimum 45 minutes. This is not an extra activity but the highlight of 8 months of work. Give it the space it deserves.